Why Do We Fear Death?

Most people have a fear of death.  But why?  Is it really all that bad or unexpected?  I would argue not.

People don’t usually go around thinking about death every day, it goes largely forgotten.  There are a few things that remind us about death from time to time, sickness or death of a loved one for example.   A spiritual journey includes a relationship with, and further understanding, of death.  Spiritual understanding of death contains some of the most important lessons of life.  

There are a few things to keep in mind before reading on;

• There has never been a living being who hasn’t died.
• You will die one day – fact.
• Death has always been part of the deal.
• Death is what gives life its meaning.
• You can’t earn or buy more time, and you don’t know how much time you have.  

This article covers death from a spiritual standpoint.

I have written previously about ego, and indeed spiritual ego.

Read “What Is Spiritual Ego?” here

Read “Accepting Death – A Spiritual Solution” here.

Let us concentrate on why you might fear death for a moment.  Your ego is your sense of self that you have created throughout your life, this sense of self is what fears death.  Thankfully this isn’t the real you – your soul is, the spirit.  Death is a transition of your energy from this form to the next plane of existence.  Your ego-self however doesn’t see this and has a hard time accepting things is cannot understand.  Similarly the ego sees only the loss of itself and the things you have gathered throughout life, it is constrained by your mind and the limited understanding the thinking mind has.

As long as you identify with that which dies rather than that which exists always, you will always have the fear of death.

You can’t take your worldly possessions with you when you die, and you will leave your loved ones behind.  Most of us know this from a very young age and yet we don’t prepare or give much time to the thought of dying.  You will often hear people say it’s “morbid” to talk about death but I would argue that birth is just as natural as death, yet one is celebrated and the other feared.  The celebration of life can be a wonderful thing when you realise there is a next phase to your journey.  Western cultures are the most guilty of this, Eastern cultures tend to have a far better relationship with death. 

I have spent a good amount of time thinking about the fear of death, including my own.  I realise that this life is only temporary and that I only have a limited time to leave things better than I found them.  The teachings of spiritual leaders such as Ram Dass and Eckhart Tolle have been crucial in my understanding of myself and my preparation for death.

We prepare for almost all of the major events in our life, except death.  Learn to prepare for death and see it as a cumulative event that is something to look forward to rather than resist.

Nobody wants a painful death, and it is the fear of pain which people often worry about more than death itself.  The cessation of consciousness comes a close second.  The reality is that more often than not death is not a painful experience these days, it is managed by ‘end of life’ care.  There are always exceptions to this of course.   

There is currently no medical evidence to suggest that the pain involved with dying is any worse than pain that people suffer in daily life from time to time.  Throughout your spiritual journey you may learn to love your aches and pains as markers from your life, try to embrace any pain at death in this way.

All your beliefs are constructs of your mind, and your mind dies with you.  Beliefs and thoughts are only matters of the mind so then you must contemplate outside of the limitations of your mind to accept death and what is represents.   The thinking and rational mind will never accept what it cannot quantify or understand, this includes the fear of death.  What lies beyond death is beyond the thinking mind and therefore is not the tool you need to use to prepare yourself. 

Put your mind aside for a moment and recognise that when it brings up emotions of sadness and fear to throw you off you can let these go.  Like visitors you can allow them in but then also allow to leave.  

A spiritual path can teach you acceptance of death, that life cannot exist without death, that everything is in perfect harmony.  Life and death are connected in an eternal cycle.  My spirituality has taught me many things but not many things have opened my eyes to “how it all is” more so than my acceptance of death.  There is a reason why, when asked, people who are about to die generally write positively rather than negatively about death.  I think it largely comes down to acceptance or mortality in the face of no other options.

• Firstly connect to your higher self and recognise the difference between your ego and your true self.  Use meditation, breath work, plant medicines (with guidance) and the books mentioned previously.
• Prepare for death – read about it and ready yourself for the day it comes.  Spend time with the thought that it will come and how will you be ready for that day.
• If the fear of death is coming from a loved one, be with them.  Embrace their death as a cumulative event and a transformation rather than an ending.  Tell them what you have learned.  Be honest with them.
• Look to cultures outside of your own and see how they celebrate death. 
• Where you can spend time with death and those who are dying. 

Realiser is born from a dream to be in a realised state, a state of awaken.  To be able to see the most obvious things having missed them for so many years.  Subsequently I want to create something to serve as an example of how it could be.  If only we might spend the time loving that we spend hating.  Above all spending the time to be kind to others for no reason.  You get the idea.  I hope you enjoyed the blog on ‘Why Do We Fear Death’.  I will travel around doing what I can and would love for you to join me.  Follow my path here…